The Best Of Search Engine Terms

I was browsing the search engine terms on my Site Stats page.  These are the words that people type into their search engines that point them in the direction of my blog.  Please allow me to share some of my favorites with you.

penis set

I can only assume searching “penis” gets you here on account of Man Rant Mondays II.  Fingers crossed that this person was eventually able to get their set of penises.

dark dots on penis near opening

Someone needs to get off the computer and head over to the doctor!  Good luck with that!

vaginal etiquette when visiting doctor (also: doctor vagina, vagina doctor)

That’s an easy one.  Vagazzle that bitch and head to the doctor.  You don’t need Google to tell you that.  Based on how many search terms were in the “vagina” category, and how searching anything with the word “vagina” gets you to my blog, I’d say that not only do people like to read about the vagina, but I clearly like to discuss it.

rant for man only

Probably this person was very disappointed when he clicked on my blog full of vagina talk.

toe polish men

I don’t know who searches these terms, but I would have loved to meet this guy.  I can already tell you he’d be a hoot!

seducing me with furry slippers

I love a person who’s easy to please.  I’m not very graceful in red slut boots.  I wish I was, because I love them.  But seduction with fuzzy bunny slippers?  Yeah, that’s right in my comfort zone.

lisa rochon bad

Hey!  I am not.

stuck on my butt

Talk about a cliffhanger!  What the hell is stuck on their butt?  Did they ever get it unstuck?  These questions are going to keep me awake at night.

second toe longer than the first smell em

Okay, you had me until “smell em”.  That’s just twisted.  Anyway, welcome to my blog, clearly you’ll like it here.

I hope you guys enjoyed these as much as I did!  I couldn’t stop laughing last night when I read some of these.  Seriously, you can’t make this stuff up!  Thank you to everyone that reads my blog.  And thank you very much to everyone that searches these terms to get here!

Advertisements

21 responses to “The Best Of Search Engine Terms

  1. ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! I am dying laughing over here at this post. I have to know what was stuck to the guys butt or I will not be able to sleep tonight. See if you can follow up on that okay?

    Like

    • I’m glad you liked it! I wish I had access to more information about the people that search these things! Some of them I’d love to be friends with, and some of them I’d just like to point and laugh at. (oh my gosh I’m so mean)

      Like

  2. You’re not mean!!!! Stupid people deserve to be laughed at!!! You should make friends with as many as possible so if one is busy, you can always turn to another to keep you entertained!! The search penis set reminds me of a joke my husband played on my years ago… maybe I’ll blog about it later… 🙂 OMG… I am still laughing… XOXO

    Like

  3. Haha I love that, there are some twisted people out there based on the things they type into search engines. But hey, if it brings more views to our blogs, then great!

    Like

  4. Oh goodness, this makes me lol to the max! I’m going to steal this idea and do the same on my blog (which is definitely more pg than yours, but there are some search term gems).

    Like

  5. I wanna know more about the smelly second toe guy (gal?)

    Like

  6. I just went to my site stats and there are NO search terms. Bwahhhh!

    Like

  7. I probably shouldn’t admit to how I ended up here… 😉

    Like

  8. Wow, I needed a good laugh tonight, thank you! It just goes to show how fucked up people are. I am always shocked when I see the search terms that lead people to my blog. .

    Like

  9. Pingback: Banished To The Island (The Second Banishing) | Lisa's Rant

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s