I hear about wives telling their husbands all the time “If I pass on before you, I just want you to be happy, even if that means that you remarry.” What?! So I figured I should have that talk with my husband. I sat him down and informed him that if I should pass on before him, I would like him to be happy. He can play golf, buy an expensive car, start a gun collection, whatever makes him happy. However, should his ass decide to remarry, I will haunt the f*ck out of them. When shit starts flying off of the shelves hitting the new wife in the back of her head…I want him to know that’s me. When she’s floating above the bed being choked out by some invisible force from hell…that’d be me. When she gets locked inside of the closet by some ghostly apparition…me again. Where ever I am, I’m still his wife. Buy a dog for Christ’s sake.
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